Hotelie Caught Doing Homework, 7 Hospitalized

Ithaca, NY – A Hotel Management major was spotted doing homework in the Arts Quad on September 7, 2015.  The first witness, who wishes to remain anonymous, recounts how his attempt to be friendly landed him in the hospital.  As an engineering student, he had never met a Hotelie before.  He stated, “I spotted her doing homework in the quad and decided to be friendly.  When I asked her major, she said she was in Hotel Management.  I don’t remember anything past that…suddenly, I was in the hospital and they were asking me what 

Similar stories have been reported by the other six people hospitalized within that hour, with hospital officials reporting all seven show signs of shock including an increased pulse rate, dilated pupils, and fainting.  The Hotelie declined to comment on this event.